Thursday, July 19, 2012

Luka


English - Creative writing (practice for internal assesment)
As the adult Luka, write a personal reflection of your childhood.
            I didn’t know whether to feel thankful or hatred for them. I sat in the empty church with a well suited military uniform as the coffin of both my parents stood before me, waiting to be buried. Considering all the time that they spent ill-treating me at home, I wasn’t surprised that no one came to honor the death of my parents. I instantly began to dwell on the horrifying memories that made me who I am today.
            I’ve always felt like I was entering some kind of a wrestling match whenever I walked into the apartment we used to live in. The only difference is that I couldn’t fight back, which made me felt like a prisoner. The way I see it, a more specific way of describing the “wrestling arena” would be a caged one. I’d run but the result would remain the same; the torture from my parents wouldn’t end until my eyes were soaked while theirs, without reasoning, were fiery.
            I was young and naive, which didn’t help at all. I had no power or knowledge for everything that was happening against me. But I grew into the agony and got braver. I accepted the mistreatment like a lost puppy as it was the only option I had; asking why would just deteriorate the situation. “Shut up!” my dad would say, and the next hit came harder. Amidst all the torment, I only had myself to talk to. Although the neighbor downstairs would occasionally question the bruises and scars, I couldn’t go on with the conversations that were full of lies.
            Today, I realized not a single tear flowed from my eyes, despite the fact that it was a shocking road accident that took their lives, I’ve cried enough. But I also comprehended that I was half thankful for without them, I wouldn’t have had the courage to join the army and won battles. Although, every now and then I still find myself wondering if this was what my parents hoped of me. All I know is that I always have been living a life that is true and honest to myself alone, and I’m planning to keep it that way. 

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